Freeze Frame
by Aerith Queen of Cetra
Summary: .: Tag to 5x16 "Dark Side of the Moon" :. How could seeing your brother die over and over again ever get easier?


_Title:_ Freeze Frame

_Summary_: .: Tag to 5x16 "Dark Side of the Moon" :. How could seeing your brother die over and over again ever get easier?

_Genre:_ Angst / Hurt / Comfort

_Beta'd:_ Nu-uh!

_Warnings_: Spoilers up until the middle of Season 5, character death, lots of angst.

**Disclaimer:** Nope, Supernatural still does not belong to me!

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**Freeze Frame  
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They had been careless. Again.

It was getting more and more common these days, between running from the devil and running from their personal problems. They hadn't thought for a single moment that they had gotten _this _sloppy. But here they were, held at gunpoint by two hunters looking for someone to let out their apocalyptic frustrations upon.

And who better to corner than the ones who had started it all.

"Hear me out. I can explain, okay? P-Please." Sam managed quickly, panic edging through his plea.

Dean stared at his brother, eyes wide enough to reason with the hunters. Normally, anyone would be blown away by those wide hazel eyes and the slight quiver of lip.

Not him though. Not Walt.

That's why it came as such a shock to Dean when he heard the blast, when he saw the light explode from the barrel. And then Sammy was falling backwards through the air, a twist of emotions flashing through his face in a split second and then... nothing.

His body bounced slightly with the spring of the mattress but by the time it settled, he was already gone.

Dean's reaction was instantaneous. The moment Sam hit the mattress Dean was flying off of his with Sam's name already curling through his tongue.

"Stay the hell down." Those four words and the metallic threat of a loaded gun were the only things keeping him from leaping onto the other bed, cradling his little brother close and begging him to open his eyes again.

It wouldn't work.

Sam was dead. _Sammy_ was dead. Again.

How many times... how many times would Dean have to see this sight? See his brother lying motionless and covered in blood?

It was oddly sickening how peaceful Sam looked in that moment, blood splattered face tilted towards him, hair splayed across the bed like sleeping beauty and... just... gone.

That horrifying chill entered his body for the fourth time in his life, the empty despair, the loneliness beyond comprehension... the image of a smiling, fourteen year old Sam turning into a twenty six year old corpse.

This was the fifth time he had died now. The Battle of Cold Oak; The wished lightning strike; Zachariah tearing out his lungs; Anna's righteous fury; and now... some foolish hunter... thinking it would make everything better.

Thinking a simple shot to the chest would fix the broken world.

Five times... And it never got easier - how could it? How could seeing your brother die over and over again _ever_ get easier?

Dean wondered for a moment if this was how Sam must have felt way back when; trapped in a no name town with the Trickster killing him over and over and Sam having to watch him die over and over. When Dean thought of how his little brother had looked by the end of it all, he wondered how Sam had the energy to keep fighting for so long.

Dean wasn't sure if he'd have been able to hold up that long, trapped in that insane approach to life. He should've pressed more into that when he had the chance.

Well, when he would _next_ get a chance really.

Lucifer wasn't about to let his prized vessel stay dead now, was he? Eventually the little red man would pull Sam back and the winged men upstairs would pull Dean back and they'd have to start this mess all over again.

Dean blinked. His eyes focused on Sam. Maybe when they came back, Dean would remember not to be so harsh, to be a better big brother than he was being at the moment, to try and be the Dean that both he and Sam needed him to be.

Until then...

"... We just snuffed his brother, you idiot! You wanna spend the rest of your life knowing Dean Winchester's on your ass? 'cause I don't. Shoot him."

He turned his head ever so slowly.

"Go ahead, Roy. Do it... but I'm gonna warn you. When I come back, I'm going to be pissed."

The hunter faltered at the look on Dean's face, caught somewhere between grief, fury and resignation. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Dean slapped his hands together in a thunderous clap.

"Come on! Let's get this show on the road!"

Something in his stomach was pulling the hunter before him away from the trigger, memories or some sort of wartime camaraderie perhaps, he wasn't sure...

"Come on already."

... but the other didn't feel anything of the sort, vengeance and the need for self preservation forcing the gun straight and steady.

Dean felt his chest constrict long before the trigger was finally pulled.

_'I'm coming Sammy...'_

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**A/N:** Just a little something I whipped together a long time ago from seeing the webclip for this episode. Dean's expression when Sam got shot was so heartbreaking!

Anyway! Hope you enjoyed and don't forget to review :)


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